The Missus and Me!

"I believe in karma. That means I can do bad things to people all day and assume they deserve it." - Dogbert

Gaze upon the picture of pure evil. I know Im going on about the evilness of penguins. I promise this will be a final or close to final rant.

*rant rant rant rant rant* evil...

I'm done. It hailed last night. Adelaide had some kick-ass storm. I was stranded in Milla's place. The interesting thing is, in that house hold, everyone thinks we are together. The household has many many people wandering all over.

For example, the house in seperated into 3 parts. A guy lives in the garage. I kid you not. And some lasy teacher lives in the attached unit. Milla has 3 other house mates. A grumpy man who's about 50ish and is I swear, the rudest man on earth. And also has some verrrrrry strange habits. The other 2 are a couple from China. Decent guy, nice girl. She wears the pants and his balls around her neck.

Milla's landlord, landlord's brother, and various crewmen (they do some business involving electric things and road works), hop by once in a while. They all think Milla and me are together. Its the knowing looks and lustful stares in our direction. Also, the painful politeness they treat us with, questions brimming from their eyes.

Whatever it is, we are the objects of great curiosity. Something resembling a freak show.

The only ones who treat us most normally, as in not caring what-so-ever, are the chinese couple. Suprise there.

But Milla and me decided to have a cheese and wine sorta thing last night. We lit candles and had a least 6 types of cheese. Very nice.

But the landlord was in the roof. He was working on something, (dont ask me what) and climbed down to see us about to feast. We chatted and I think he's slightly homophobic yet finds the concept of 2 women together alluring.

I don't think it helps that Milla and me call each other , "darling", "love" or "babe".

It also doesnt help that she calls me 'her man'. And I call her my wifie.

People in Melbourne think we are together as well. Owe up, you guys know who you are.

But!

Yes, I shall accept it. At least I married a gorgeous woman. My pretty, TALL scandanavian wife.

Look at us. Would we ever do anything the least bit, remotely evil?

Plus, we have been trying to teach each other Mandarin and Norwegian. We can't decide who is worst than who.

Oh well, at least we try. And I am apparentlty, the perfect man.

Another post! Freegans! FREEGANS!

For the visually stimulated, here's a pretty picture of a Freegan and some Freegan cheese. ARGH!!! Freegan!

"I believe in karma. That means I can do bad things to people all day and assume they deserve it." - Dogbert

I actually moved my sick ass to a tutorial. I am so clogged up its funny. But I am back again and surfing.

Found a werid website. Cant seem to figure out if its a joke or not. Its about Freegans.

'Freeganism is a total boycott of an economic system where the profit motive has eclipsed ethical considerations and where massively complex systems of productions ensure that the products we buy will have detrimental impacts we may never even consider. '

Its a disturbing concept. I really can't figure out if its for real.

It's basically a 'cheap' form of living. You dig through dumpsters for food. You look in the back of supermarkets, delis, resturants, etc etc.

I may be a poor uni student but I'm not digging that far. The pictures are acting funny and merely sticking to the top. I wonder why.

Im slightly disturbed by all of this actually.

Im hungry. Shall hunt for food. I'm a bit put off cheese and bread and fruits. Explore the site. Tell me what you think.

Is it a joke? Or is it real?

Oh, I do love to be by the seaside!

"I believe in karma. That means I can do bad things to people all day and assume they deserve it." - Dogbert

Despite the fact its winter. Or is it? I am so sick today. My poor tropical body cannot stand the sudden changes in weather. 5 days ago, it was freezing cold. Then for the weekend, it was warm. I could wear my indecent postage stamp skirt during the day. Then, now its cold again. Winter came back for a while. And I am now sick.

The ups and downs. Sorta like home. Singapore I mean. I should technically, be used to the flactuating weather conditions. For example, back home, in the space of 5mins, you can jump from a lovely enviroment of 18 degrees to 36 degrees, as soon as you step out of a shopping mall, train station, bus. That's a difference of 18 degrees. Double the heat in less the time.

But I hardly get sick back home. Must be the company of my dogs.

And one thing I enjoy doing, which is odd, is eating ice cream in winter. You are all bundled up, warm and toasty inside and then you get ice cream. The cold chills your mouth and you struggle to eat it, but once its in, its all warm and gooey. I did that during an English and Canadian winter. I never seem to travel to that part of the world at any other season.

But winter, its almost over. There's nothing I love more during winter, other than ice cream or seeing your breath (you can do it in singapore as well, if you smoke), is having someone to hold hands with.

Holiday romances are fun. But, my favorite memory, is strolling down Robson, and then he smiles at me. Asks if I'm cold. Kisses me on the forehead when I do not answer, but silently reaches out to hold my hand. And we stay that way, for a while. Holding hands at Granville Island, stealing kisses on the street. Sharing hot caramel apple ciders on the beach. Yes, all during winter.

There's nothing quite like having someone to love. But for now, I have my friends. I do love them, I do adore them. But sometimes, like when I'm sick, and alone (people still have uni and jobs to go to. sadly the world doesnt end cos I am sick), i get a bit, mmm, I don't quite know.

Just been going to the beach recently. Stirring up a lot of memories.

Some memories are better left unremembered. But, I have shared some here, but most I keep inside. My little treasure box of happier times. When I am alone, I take one out at a time, examining it and basking in the glow of it. It's hard sometimes, when you forget how its like to be happy. Memories remind you. But, its no point living in the past, but you have to, sometimes, or I have to. I need to remind myself to smile.

You smile, you laugh, you jest, you smile.

I shall dream of days, when I can sit on the beach, ice cream in one hand and a warm hand in the other. I wait, and imagine how it would be like, watching the dogs play on the sand, ice cream dripping down my hand, and more stolen kisses.

Some day, maybe. But for now, I shall sit by the sea side. Watching the waves crash into each other, and the smiling faces of people around me.

I do feel so lonely sometimes. It doesn't help that your best friends are on the other side of the world, with all the continents thought possible seperating you.

Reminds me of a cheesy Elvis (?) song, 'I'm so lonely, I'm so lonely, I could die.'

Oh! The evilness of clowns and penguins... And the daftness of some women...

"I believe in karma. That means I can do bad things to people all day and assume they deserve it." - Dogbert

This may sound horrible, but sometimes, I can't stand the skinny ditzy female blonde. And I know its the stereo-type but there's hardly any smoke without any fire. But, I shall plod on and continue with the story.

Tonight was to be a night of laughter and entertainment. It was to be a night of *drumroll*
theatre sports!!! The spontanous action, the unexpected to be expected... But, I managed to go for a charity night thingie. It had, wait for it, Adelaide celebrities.

That's sorta like an oxymoron, like military intelligence, airline food, living dead (????), psychiatric care, kosher ham or my favorite, Hyundai Excel. Never trust Korean cars. That's the best piece of advice my daddy ever gave me.

Back to the place, Jive it was called, on Hindley, Australia's deadiest street. It was packed, sorta pumping. The only 'celebrity' i recognised was Jane something from Channel Ten weather. Anyway, it started with people from radio, tv, theatre, some other places famous people come from. People may wonder. Whats with the clowns?? I thought fern was only fearful of penguins.

I do not fear penguins. They fear me. I have an anti-penguin aura with death inducing rays emitting from my pupils to any penguin that may stare me in the eye. But, clowns. *brrrr* They were all over cos they were collecting money for the humor foundation. The clown doctors that roam hospitals, bringing cheer to all the people.

Nothing against clowns, they are fine as long as there is one person inbetween me and the clown. I do not like clowns. They are scary, loud and too colourful. And no one can be THAT happy. Anything human that is too happy, cheery and bright scares me. It makes me uneasy, clowns and all that jolliness. It's a strange thing I cannot explain.

It was sorta funny, the show. I mean, I may have been spoilt by 'Whose Line is it Anyway?' but I know whats funny and not. But as I mentioned above, the blonde one. She was on the behind-the-scenes news team. Journalist.

The group was playing a game where they had a scene and was suppose to act it out and say the alphabet as it went along. As in the first line had to stay with 'A' then a 'B', so on and so forth. Tra la la la la... I just remember i told someone I never use so on and so forth. Just proving that person right. Bah! *sticks tongue out*

This girl, Blondie, was terrible. I know I shouldnt diss but when it came to her turn, 'G'. The letter 'G'. She stopped, and went, "Geeeeeeeeeeezus Chirst!"

I kid you not. Also, in another game, she was a russian astronut. But, all she could say was "I'm Russian" and "VODKA!"

Im sure she is nice in real life. I also bumped into her in the toilet. We were speaking and she asked me where I was from. "Singapore," I answered, truthfully. I need not lie to everyone I meet. Except clowns. And maybe my mother, :P. The usual reply was recieved, "China?? You are from China? That is so cool. And you speak english! How cool is that?" Agreeing it was cool, she asked me one more question. "You are pretty short for a Chinese person."

Hello??? Chinese, asian people? Tend to be shorter? ANd why would you point it out to anyone? She didnt even say it in a nice way. So in a way, its normal, even acceptable for me to be short.

So it's okie for her to be dumb cos she is blonde. Socially acceptable.

I get that logic.

Don't Speak...

"I believe in karma. That means I can do bad things to people all day and assume they deserve it." - Dogbert

I find it interesting, how some people can talk so much, yet say nothing at all. Quoting a song from the album 'Tragic Kingdom' by No Doubt (1995? Correction?), 'dont speak'. But, i know the song lyrics and what is going through my mind doesnt quite connect. But the logic is somewhat the same.

Reading some blogs, talking to people, face to face or otherwise, how much actually runs in the under currents?

The undertones, what the person actually feels. What they actually think about you. Do they think you're a talkative ass with half a peanut for a brain? Do they pretend to listen but are really just staring down your top? Or even better, do they insult you, shun you but actually believe you are their soulmate? Is this some perverse form of self preservation?

I'm just wondering.

I'm back! With books and baggage in arms...

"I believe in karma. That means I can do bad things to people all day and assume they deserve it." - Dogbert

Forever ain't ever long enough. Or forever is actually a real, real, real long time. But let's not get into how long forever is. My Counselling and Augumentative lectures go on forever for me. And that is when, I rest. Sleep, until my lecturer (evil evil woman) comes up from behind me and proceeds to grab my shoulders.

She just does it for the kicks. I swear.

Anyway, interesting things have happened. I can now start up my own Libary. Yes, come to Townhouse XX on FLinders University. Wide range of books, from poetry (Wordsworth, Blake, Yeats, I adore Yeats) to some heavy shit (i consider heavy shit as in books i should read, have read once, and hardly would find the interest or energy to read again ie Our Mutual Friend.) and the ever classic, Mills and Boons.

YEs, i know i was dissed on it before. It is in a sense, the lowest form of literiture. Thats what makes it so fun. Its 50cents per book. I went Op shop shopping, or those from other lands, Salvation Army shopping. I love old pre-loved books.

Anyway, back to how dodgey my reading taste is. Mills and Boons is bad, but fun to read. Its easy, brainless and yes, I, me, moi, the cynical one, would like to believe in 'love'.

Im gonna ignore the gasps of horror.

I would love to believe in 'love'. I find the concept of love very disturbing. In a way, I love my friends and family. But, as mentioned, english is so limited in the language or terms of 'love'.

I would do almost anything for my family and friends. But when it comes to a man, (or woman, god knows) I would find it almost impossible. For one person, love, you should place that person before yourself in almost everything. You take their interests, likes, dislikes, preferences, job, children (?) into account before you do anything yourself.

Its like giving up independence. I would not want to consult anyone, before i spend my own money. Money i have earnt, or before I decide to eat crocodile for dinner. Fuck all to waht he wants. Its hard. Im not ready to give anymore.

I used to give. I used to try. Now, i honestly cant be bothered with men.

The cheats, bastards, lying bastards, scum, ones who refuse to let you have a life outside from them, the ones that hit you when you answer back, the ones that yell at you and make you feel like the most stupid ugly person on earth and they tell you that you should be grateful that someone can stand your presense, to the men that break your heart and when its healing, they come back and dash it again. The ones that wont take no for an answer and try to force themselves upon you. The men that try to own you. The ones that steal from you. The men that make you cry over everything. The ones that continue to lead you on, the one that you know you shouldnt love, would do anything for, but wont cos you prefer self preservation. The ones that spread untrue stories, the ones that cause you to sever relationships with family and friends. The ones that leave you, alone and crying at the bus stop, when you beg them not to leave, cos you have no one else.

The men in my life, all of the above true, I wonder why I am too dysfuntional for a relationship.

I want a dog family.

*woof*

My bleeding heart...

"I believe in karma. That means I can do bad things to people all day and assume they deserve it." - Dogbert

My mother discovered my blog, (HI MOM) and she says I write straight out of a Mills and Boons novel. Especially my short story, 'what it means to love'. Cheese, fluffy cheese and more cheese. Thanks Mom. I love ya too.

At least, you are honest. I think I shall never write again. Or not for a while anyway.

Here come the penguins...

"I believe in karma. That means I can do bad things to people all day and assume they deserve it." - Dogbert

Remember what I said about penguins? They have an army now. Check out this Penguin!

And they even have gay penguins!!! I have nothing against people who like people. But, I am not fond of penguins. But we know how its actually the male penguins who hatch the eggs, so in a way, 2 males would make the job go faster. And this book, is based on fact.

At least, I know, I am not alone in this cold cruel world. There are people like me. I might be going crazy over the links, cos i just figured out how to do them.

Well, I may head off. Drink tea, feast on chocolate biscuits. Sleep well, dont let the penguins bite!

Sometimes bacteria is the only culture people have... And where has all the common fashion sense gone?

"I believe in karma. That means I can do bad things to people all day and assume they deserve it." - Dogbert

Tis true. Sometimes, when I watch people around me, here in Adelaide, I wonder. The old saying that some people are dragged up, not brought up. Milla and me were people watching in Rundle Mall on a Thursday afternoon and we were somewhat shocked by the Australian fashion. Or is it just Adelaide?

1. Why does every female own that Bonds jumper? The blue and green stripey one? We saw FAAAAAAAAR too many.
2. Whats with all the cut-out shirts? Looking like a cheap $2 hooker on Hindley (incidentally, Australia's most violent crime filled street), is not a good look
3. Polka dots and stripes and animal prints are interesting. Not all together.
4. Jeans two sizes too big. Or jeans two sizes too small. No one here seems to know their size when it comes to jeans.
5. I know this sounds bad, but people who are big but wear pants a size too small. And the pin stripes on the pants run zigzag cos its stretched in werid places. Its not a nice look.
6. Sorry honey, but 3 pony tails, one on each side of your head and your fringe, is not nice. Pls, remove it at once. A coconut tree popping out in the middle of your forehead is not a good look.
7. Big big fuzzy boots and mini skirts. See point 2 on Hindley hookers.
8. I know shorts are in fashion. But one must be smart as well. Its no point being terribly fashionable on a cold wet rainy day. Its summer in the rest of the world. Australia will almost always be 6 months behind. Get over it. Its not posh to be uncomfortable, freezing and 'suffering' to be fashionable. Please, dress suitably. Nobody wishes to see your legs so goose pimpled that I could exfoliate by rubbing my face against your thighs.
9. Actually know what colours suit you. Red and pink do NOT go together, they never have and never will. Plus, very few chinese look good in yellow (esp pale lemon yellow), most of you are not them.
10. Leg warmers = Flashdance=Eighties. Good music, BAAAAAAAAAD fashion.

Thats my bitch. There was a lot more that was observed in Rundle Mall. I'm just trying to be nice. Its a werid thing, but me and Milla said some pretty nasty things. But, as I said, its hard to see people in clothes that do not suit them, clolours tat make them look so wrong, and jeans that sag in th ass. I like people to look good, they feel better about themselves

I am not trying to make myself look charitable but... People here need help. Not everything that is fashionable looks good. I would look TERRIBLE in the gipsy skirts and YELLOW dresses or tops. Plus, I doubt i can carry off the little 3/4 work pant thing or wearing green or pink denim jeans. Peach eye makeup would make me look dead.

Remember, fashion is everchanging. We need to know what suits us best, and sorta stick to it. Experiment, but please, don't try too hard. People can tell.

I'm a WHAT?

"I believe in karma. That means I can do bad things to people all day and assume they deserve it." - Dogbert

When people have too much time on their pretty little hands, its amazing what they would do. I? Moi? I spent like the afternoon taking online tests. I know, I am sad. It was tickle.com or something like that.

I recommand the inkblot test. Apparently, Im a hippie, rooting for peace. And I am a golden retriver (I cant spell it!!! AHHHHH), the dog test. Thank god it didnt go, you are an outright bitch, Green.

And finally, I am a Sphinx. I didnt know that was techincally a Goddess. Which I am of course, always liked to think I was more Isis-y than anything else. But, they're from the same bloody country. I should be glad of that.

Anyway, I have no idea why Im putting it down. But the description of the Sphinx-ish person was funny. Here it is :

You are a mysterious being, Lady Sphinx, distinguished by your deep wisdom, strength, and royal power. You've also got a special something that draws people to you — even if they can't explain why. Maybe it's because you're always immersed in thought, pondering everything around you — your music, the fashion scene, or the latest movies.It's not that you need to be on top of everything, it's just that you prefer to walk a stable path through this life, and that's easier for you to do if you know what's goin' on. But beyond your keen awareness of the world, you also have a strong intuition — which is probably why friends and family think of you as such a sage goddess. This natural ability to just sense things makes you a great judge of character when meeting new friends, or attracting a new crush. So don't be afraid to use these otherworldly goddess powers to spark some love in your realm, Ms. Sphinx! Work that intrigue. Your gifts make you alluring, but not too revealing. You'll always hold the secrets of life and keep 'em guessing. You've got plenty to show the world — so get out there and show them what you're made of!

I think I shall!

I shall flash my boobs! WOO HOO!!!